#5303 – dang, dang, dang, dang, dang, dang, dang, dang

yesterday i went to my first charm city roller girls bout in a long time. for a while i was tired of going to bouts since it meant basically losing one saturday each month so i could get a sore butt from sitting on the hard floor for hours, a sore back from hunching over my camera gear, a headache from the loudspeakers, not feeling well from being dehydrated, and then losing sunday (and possibly the next few days too) as i spent that time editing my photos which all basically looked the same. then grad school got in the way and i was lucky to have pretty much any free time, and then for the last several months i felt like it’d be too awkward to go. but when i got the portraits from paigeyiscrazey i told cynicalscribe that it’s been too long since i last watched girls in fishnets on skates and said on thursday that i might go to saturday’s bout.

i never showed our portraits paige did on here, did i? let’s fix that:


i’m going to have to wait to get a framed version of the pair of my own. i got carrie’s framed as part of a sale just before i went to florida, and i’m not going to have the money to spare for a bit (not unless they have another sale on custom framing…). then again, since i’m not allowed to put any holes in the walls at my apartment, it’s not like i could hang it up (unless i maybe tried one of those 3M picture-hanging adhesive things, and i’m not sure if i want to trust that to hold up this art).

i ended up buying a ticket thursday afternoon online and went. this time i came prepared; i took excedrin before i left (for the headache and any aches/pains to come), and brought my water bottle to stay hydrated. i can’t believe i didn’t think to do these things when i used to go. maybe i did? i can’t remember. i would have brought my seat cushion too but that was back at my parents’ house.

it was weird being back after being away for so long. when i checked in on foursquare it said that it was my first visit there in a year (thanks, foursquare), but then again there was only one other check-in for me ever at du burns arena. it was weird driving to the bout by myself, it was weird having to stand in line to get in, and it was weird sitting in the bleachers rather than on the floor where i usually sit for my photography. i brought my camera with me, but i wasn’t able to get any photos – the plexiglass and netting in front of my seat in the bleachers obscured much of my view.

i couldn’t tell if people i knew remembered or recognized me. reckless ndangerment nodded and said hi to me as i came up to stand in line to get in (though i couldn’t tell if she was just greeting the line to come in), and everywhere else i looked i saw only new skaters. i had also grown out my goatee since i had last been to a bout, so there’s that. i began to recognize a few people from my seat, but nobody was close to me for me to say hi. i posted on twitter how i didn’t recognize anybody and mya bloody valentine replied back with a “that’s your fault :x”… it didn’t do much for my confidence, but it was true.

the bout went well – speed regime won, and the charm city all-stars won.

i won a free flying dog beer t-shirt (some girl came walking in front of my area of the bleachers and asked who wanted one, so i raised my arms and she tossed one to me).

the couple next to me, it was clear that it was the lady’s first time at a derby bout, and the guy she was with was explaining everything to her: from how the game was played, to how jazzometer made the electronic scoreboard, and even mentioned something about men’s derby. he couldn’t remember the men’s derby team’s name, so i piped up with “oh, you mean harm city homicide… i used to skate with them”. he asked me my derby name (“killer glennuine draft” “oh, yes, i remember!” – yeah, right! i was in two bouts, and only skated in one of those, and that one was out of state!), and later on the lady with him started fumbling for her bout program and a pen. the guy asked “what are you doing?” and she said “we need to get his autograph!”, so that was the first time i was ever asked for my autograph as a derby skater, bahahahaha.

i was also selected for a charm city cake-eating contest at halftime. they had people who were interested in competing stand up, and they selected 3 people from that crowd. announcer dirty marty said that he’d go select one person from my side of the arena; he’d run over, and the first person he’d see would be the contestant. he ran over and there were maybe only one or two other people standing up in my section, and he looked up and saw me and said “you! you… uh, you’re the one i picked.” as he realized who he picked. i made my way down to the track for the contest and marty was talking to spam, another announcer, and since they both knew me marty was saying “he was the first one i saw! d’you think people will think i picked him deliberately?” he turned to me. “well, you’ve been away for so long, i’m sure it’s ok.” so i got my cake-eating on. didn’t win, but i ended up looking like this:

i used pingo as my inspiration.

i got cake and frosting up my nose (i couldn’t breathe out of one nostril), and afterwards i went off to the bathroom to wash my face and blow my nose, but even still i was picking bits of cake and frosting out of my beard all night, and the frosting up my nose has been sometimes making me smell something slightly sour occasionally.

i went for a walk around the arena afterwards and saw mya bloody valentine and talked with her for a little bit since she was working the merchandise stand. she gave me a hug and asked me how i was doing and i said fine… i couldn’t tell exactly what or how much she wanted to know. i also saw fightscrime and she said how my earlier post made it sound like i’m having a pretty awesome year. i still can’t believe half of the things that happened in that year-in-summary post. i also checked out the items up for silent auction and watched some of the second bout from up in the lobby; my butt hurt from sitting in the bleachers and i was glad to stand for a bit. it kind of made me glad too that i wasn’t sitting in my usual photography spot on the floor since i remembered how much i’d ache afterwards. from up in the lobby i saw some guy standing and chatting with cynicalscribe and figured he was her new guy, and all but confirmed it when i saw them share a hug after the game. i’m… not sure what to think or how to feel. :/ from where i was standing and from what i could see of him from the lobby, it was weird – to me, he looked a lot like me. tall, thin, brown hair, glasses. with them standing between me and the bout, trying to not look at the two of them between me and the skating was making me feel uncomfortable so i returned to the bleachers to watch the rest of the bout from a different angle. i was curious, but i also don’t want to be creepy. :/

after the bout i helped with floor breakdown. i didn’t have to as i paid to get in, but i wanted to pitch in and help. i didn’t feel very well though after a bit and felt like i was going to pass out – other than a late lunch all i had to eat was that cake at halftime – so i grabbed a slice of pizza and sat down and rested for a bit, but the pizza was too greasy and wasn’t helping me feel any less queasy. eventually i just tossed the rest of my slice of pizza and got back to work. carrie and i made small chit-chat after a while… she asked me if i got any pictures and i had to say no and explain how my view was obscured. she said if she knew i was coming she could have put me on the photographers list, and that just goes to show how long it’s been since i’ve been to a bout since i didn’t even know there was a photographers list now. i’ll have to keep that in mind for next time.

i made a stop at the afterparty for a little bit (well, an hour and a half). in terms of afterparties, this one was pretty weak. there have been others that were much more fun and well-attended in the past. there were still a few people there, though – aideedee was happy to see me until she saw i was wearing a speed regime shirt, since her team just lost to speed regime. also talked with a few people i hadn’t seen in ages, and sicky nixx was asking me about the nasa tweetup i went to since she works with space telescopes. i was also able to find a copy of the latest run of the baltimore city paper so i could see my photo in print:

they’re supposed to mail me two tickets for the baltimore city paper’s “best of baltimore” party in september as way of saying thanks for using my photo. i need to find a +1 to be my guest.

made it back home by 2 am, in bed and asleep by about 2:30, and awake again at 7 am thanks to weird dreams that were so bizarre and surreal i couldn’t tell if they were nightmares or what. stuff like my grandfather was going to assassinate the president, and since a new election just finished i thought he was going to kill obama, and my fears were only intensified when we were walking around and suddenly a us marshal (not a secret service agent) stepped out of nowhere to escort us around… right next to where the president’s podium was going to be! i was really worried at this point that my grandfather was going to do something crazy, but he pulled a gun out of his pocket and tossed it on the ground and said that he did that so people would know he wasn’t planning on shoot the president, and we found out that the president’s speech was going to be given elsewhere and edited to look like it was given at the podium next to us. then i found out that obama was not only still president of the united states, but the election worked out so that baltimore orioles’ announcer jim hunter was also going to be a co-president (not a vice president, but a second president altogether), and that it was his speech we were waiting for.

people i knew were in this dream doing odd things too: while we were waiting for the president’s speech i saw carrie throw her phone in a straight line and it would float in slow-motion, and she’d slide/run down a hill (it looked like it had recently rained and the hill was slippery) and catch it before it hit the ground, all the while somehow using her phone to record a video of herself doing so from a completely different angle, and then repeat it back up the hill. there were all sorts of things happening like that that defied the usual laws of physics. then i went into this house where there were a bunch of friends and coworkers and some people from the NASA tweetup endless barbecue i attended were there too, but i didn’t really know any of them – i just knew who they were supposed to be. this house was a combination of biltmore mansion and winchester mystery house and the house from the endless barbecue. i was talking with three people who kept changing, though it was always three of them, and we were trying to decide what things we could fit in my car. everybody had a really large thing that they wanted me to carry and there were lots of arguments over what i’d put in my car. the only things i remember really arguing over were how one friend wanted me to carry her rabbit hutch, and a coworker wanted me to carry their giant duffle bag. i was freaking out by everyone yelling at me over whose stuff i should carry in my car and not really knowing who everyone was, and i kept getting lost inside this maze of a house.

there were also all these food trucks parked in the yard of this giant house, and there was a sign to show which ones were open or closed. i was standing on an outside deck arguing with people when a stormcloud started to form. it looked like a giant piece of lichen was forming in midair. it started to rain so we ran inside, but it was these giant waxy multi-colored raindrops that stuck to the windowpanes, and then when regular raindrops hit them they formed small kaleidoscope patterns that wouldn’t drip down but just mixed in place on the windowpanes. i ran over to the food truck status sign, but they all closed because of the rainbow rain. i think the lesson here is that you shouldn’t gorge on cake, eat a slice of greasy pizza, and have a beer all before bedtime.

alright, i need to take a shower and change, and you bet i’m going to give my beard a rinsing. 😛 maybe i ought to just shave it off. i kind of like having my beard, but then again i don’t care for it during certain things. cake-eating contests, for example…